United States: My first trip in five years laced with trepidation as I enter a badly divided country
Sunday I return to the United States for the first time in five years. Am I overdue? No. I am overdue for a colonoscopy. I’d almost rather do that. I’m going to Moldova and Romania in October. I look forward to that. Same with possibly Ukraine. The U.S? No.
Since the U.S. started circling the drain under Donald Trump, I told people the only events that could get me back would be a high school reunion or a family wedding. My 50th reunion in Eugene, Oregon, is July 20. My nephew’s wedding outside San Luis Obispo, California, is July 20. I am attending only the reunion’s meet ‘n greet in a favorite old tavern, The Paddock (est. 1947), July 19 then catching a 6 a.m. flight the next morning for California.
I have two fears: One, I will walk into “The Pad” and see all my ex-girlfriends, scowling at the door, waiting for me with full beers in hand; two, I will walk into any tavern in the U.S. and see MAGA hats.
I look forward to the reunion, grudges notwithstanding, and the wedding. But I’m returning to a country divided like two groups of soccer hooligans squaring off before a match.
United States divided
Since we last went to the U.S. for Christmas in 2019 … let’s see. What has happened? Well, a cop in Minneapolis murdered a Black man on video and Republicans defended the cop, Trump pooh-poohed Covid leading tens of thousands of Americans to their deaths, he killed Roe vs. Wade, he instigated a riot on the capitol, he got convicted for falsifying records to cover up hush money paid to a porn star he shtoinked four months after his wife gave birth then saw his fundraising skyrocket, Pres. Biden impersonated an extra in Night of the Living Dead in a debate and we Democrats are scrambling for a possible replacement.
I can picture Biden being dragged by his heels out of the White House, babbling about Delaware’s salt water taffy. If only Trump had left that easily.
The U.S. is a mess like I’ve never seen it, and I lived through the Vietnam War. That’s coming from me living in a country that has had 69 governments since World War II and whose current prime minister has been slammed for leading a party with fascist roots.
I’ve been told to brace myself for sticker shock. Don’t expect a glass of wine under $10. Then get ready for the headache three hours later. Car rentals are nearing the price of cruise ships. In New York, where I’m spending two nights on the way over and one night on the way back, the average nightly cost of a hotel has topped $300 for the first time.
But politics is what separates the U.S. from the rest of the world although we’re all suffering from inflation. That isn’t Biden’s fault. I’m trying to figure out how to keep my backpack under eight kilos or ITA Airways will charge me €120 for both Rome-New York legs. ITA: Inflation Through the Arse.
Avoid politics
I told myself, as I did when I visited in 2019, not to discuss politics. Since Hair Hitler’s election in 2016, I have met three Americans in Europe who were Trump supporters. All ended badly. We were yelling nose to nose within 30 seconds.
Granted, in Eugene and San Luis Obispo you’ll find more hats sporting marijuana leaves than the MAGA label. But a 50-year high school reunion is a melting pot that has been stirred in various locales for the last half century. Who knows if our old star pitcher shows up with a giant American flag draped over his pickup?
In my home country, I already feel threatened. In Rome I feel safe. During Trump’s apocalypse of a presidency, I’d read his rants, his threats, his insults and would take my venom out on faceless readers on Facebook. But then I walked outside in my Monteverde neighborhood and felt like I entered a new world, one in which no one likes Trump nor believes Covid would go away when warm weather arrived.
Italians don’t have the hatred I and my fellow Democrats have. Italians’ big question was always: How in the world did Donald Trump get elected? Now it’s: How in the world does a country with 320 million people not have a candidate better than Trump or Biden? Or resemble Italian prime minister Giorgia Meloni and put at least one proper English sentence together?
Current situation
I have no answer. It’s embarrassing. It’s exasperating. It’s confusing.
All I know is Republicans now have the upper hand. Biden’s debate two weeks ago could not have gone worse if he projectile vomited on the moderators. Now Biden’s one bad night is suddenly worse than Trump’s one bad presidency.
And I don’t want to hear about it.
I’m going to discuss our playoff baseball team from 1974, other people’s kids and, if anyone asks, my new book. I’ll drink cheap beer, eat Pacific salmon and walk along Oregon’s beautiful, wide, unspoiled beaches.
I’ll laugh with old friends, toast my nephew and go winery hopping in Southern California. I will not campaign for Biden. I will not rant about Trump. This will be a mission in peace.
I will return to Rome with Clif Bars, Excedrin and memories. Then my friends in Rome will ask me, “Was it good to be home?”
I’ll answer, “No. I am home. Rome is home.”
Andrea
July 9, 2024 @ 12:07 pm
This reminds me of people too afraid to travel, imagining the peril and crime at every turn. Politics in the US has become like people backing sports teams. Is it worth it to hate supporters of a rival club, or see only their worst ideas?
I come from Eastern WA and see the craziest MAGA sh*te when I travel home. Not my taste and not my ideas, but I can also see that most people hold it as a series of unreflected ideas that someone else has given them. I can see their humanity even if Trump has convinced poorer people that they can also be hateful and rude like him.
It’s sad that the US has become so unserious and no one wants to be adults. I don’t want to be knee jerk and unserious as a response.
Have fun at both events. I would come armed with HS stories, that will likely be the core of your time.
John Henderson
July 9, 2024 @ 3:21 pm
Thanks for the sound advice, Andrea. Your approach is right; mine is wrong. But I can’t help it. I hate these people.
Cristina
July 9, 2024 @ 2:23 pm
Dear John,
I haven’t been commenting on any of your last postings but not because I am not reading —I never miss a post! But I must comment on this one because I need to warn you that nothing you say or imagine resembles the truth about this country. It is worse! Be prepared. Girddle your loins! Tanti auguri to your nephew and godspeed HOME!
John Henderson
July 9, 2024 @ 3:20 pm
Thanks, Cristina. I consider myself warned. I feel like I’m entering a war zone or some post-apocalyptic disaster movie.
Mike Boese
July 9, 2024 @ 3:53 pm
Hi John!
Tend to agree with your sentiments. I don’t see anyway Biden(who hands down is the most progressive president of my life) can win this election but I’m just dumbfounded that anyone can vote for the convicted felon.
Oh well, download The Beautiful Game on Netflix if you haven’t seen it….some beautiful shots of Rome and a pretty good story.
John Henderson
July 10, 2024 @ 7:19 am
I read a Charles Blow column in the New York Times that said Biden dropping out plays straight into the Republicans’ hands. Frankly, I don’t see another candidate getting enough momentum over four months. Who? I’m just glad I live over here when the Cheeto-faced Cumtrumpet unleashes his four-year revenge tour.
ALICE GRANT CHAMBERS
July 9, 2024 @ 4:48 pm
John if you go a little early in OR you can attend my son’s music festival- here is the FB post:
For decades I’ve been working on projects that bring people together to summon inspiration from the participants whether on stage or in the space surrounding. More than 100 people from 5 continents with ages spanning 6 decades and diversity of experience representing some of the far reaches of the world we live in contribute to the project Liberation Movement.
I personally traveled to many places to soak in the atmosphere and bring that energy into musical creations. My art… See more
0:01 / 3:13
Grant Chambers
Tickets are http://www.nwwrf.com see U all there!
Greetings Massive | NWWRF
NWWRF.COM
Greetings Massive | NWWRF
John Henderson
July 10, 2024 @ 7:17 am
Thanks, but unfortunately, the 19th is the date of my high school reunion in Eugene, two hours south.
Brett
July 9, 2024 @ 6:51 pm
Best of luck to you. If I am not traveling, I just stick to home, work, and errands these days. It shocks me that so many MAGA folks are traveling now. They always talk about how much they hate Europe (and immigrants, and other countries in general), lol!! But now more and more are going to these progressive countries…no idea why other than they see it as a badge of accomplishment or one-upmanship to their liberal acquaintances. I would say something like, I hope it will open their minds, but in my experience it doesn’t…they still get mad and confrontational when something challenges their beliefs…even while traveling!! One thing I do notice: they tend to stick to cruises and resorts so they are pampered and served by the locals. That way they don’t have to “deal with” the local culture and don’t have any natural interactions with local people. I know that not everyone who takes a cruise or goes to a resort is MAGA, but just saying…seems to be a consistent choice/pattern with people of that “America First” worldview. Personally, I would not go to a high school reunion (and I don’t). It would most definitely ruin a trip home if I were happily living in Italy. But, I live in MAGA country so…
John Henderson
July 10, 2024 @ 7:15 am
Funny, I have only met one two Republicans in Rome in 10 years here. One was a woman from California who was exploring European cities to move to and escape the Biden Administration and his open-door immigration policy. And guess what? She’s an Iranian-American. Who parents moved to the U.S. to escape the Khomeini regime when she was a little girl. The other guy was a redneck from Texas who partied every night in Campo de’ Fiori. Yes, I got in fights with both. I think you’re right. All the Republicans who travel go on cruises or all-inclusives. I knew one woman in Denver who went to Puerto Vallarta every year for 20 years with the same group of friends at the same resort. She said she has never met a Mexican.
Brett
July 10, 2024 @ 6:34 pm
Oh wow, that is just insane! I don’t know why anyone would go to Mexico if they don’t want to meet and learn about the local people. Texas guy – just weird. I mean, he could party with other MAGA folks in Texas so why go all the way to Italy?? And, the Iranian woman…I just have no words for her ignorance (pure stupidity?). How on Earth do people convince themselves that Biden has an “open-door” immigration policy? It couldn’t be further from the truth…and then she wants to move to a place that actually has a more lax policy? Haha, doesn’t seem to register to her how relatively easy it is for someone like her to move to Europe, lol. Much harder to move to the US! Sending all the positive energy to you for your trip…
John Henderson
July 11, 2024 @ 7:12 am
Thanks, Brett. Yes, the irony of the Iranian-American bitching about Biden’s immigration policy was not lost on me.
Leslie
July 9, 2024 @ 10:09 pm
Good luck and have fun at your events. It may not be as bad in California or Oregon but I can no longer return to the part of Florida I grew up in an am almost estranged from siblings and friends due to the reasons you mentioned above. I was feeling ok about things until the debate and Joe’s performance was like a punch in the gut. I envy you living in Rome (where I’ve been several times – my American friend married an Italian and they live there), and having a true sense of community and peace that hasn’t been eroded by all the crazy in the US. I can’t believe our country is literally tearing itself apart over a convicted lying felon and our actual democracy is at stake. I am looking at a game plan to leave the U.S. and trying to get my husband on board if worst case scenario happens and Danger Yam becomes a dictator.
John Henderson
July 10, 2024 @ 7:10 am
Danger Yam! That’s new. Good one. I always preferred the Cheeto-Faced Cumtrumpet but I used it too many times. What country are you looking to move to? Portugal is popular right now. Much more efficient and cheap than Italy.
Leslie
July 10, 2024 @ 2:04 pm
While I love Italy, I know how difficult it is to become a citizen 🙁
Currently on my in-case-of-need-to-flee list: Portugal, Germany (ancestry), Scotland, and Costa Rica. I wish we could join Christina in Canada but have a feeling there would be a line of cars at the border from Niagara to South Carolina of people 🙁
John Henderson
July 11, 2024 @ 7:14 am
No need to be a citizen. Just move here and keep renewing your visa. That’s what I did for 10 years. I am totally disillusioned about the U.S. but I have no desire to become an Italian citizen. I’m eligible but there are no benefits for me. Plus, as you pointed out, it’s a major hassle. I am now awaiting my 10-year Carta di Soggiorno, instituted last year.
Michael Klahr
July 9, 2024 @ 10:33 pm
Eager to hear how many ex-girlfriends appear at the tavern, beers in hand. Were there platoons? Offense and Defense? Or are they two way players? Very funny, enjoyed it.
John Henderson
July 10, 2024 @ 7:09 am
What I didn’t write is they were all in the class behind me. But that class is invited, too. Thanks for the note, buddy. Enjoy Maine.
Cristina
July 10, 2024 @ 4:49 am
I live in Canada, although I’m waiting to board a flight to Napoli. We just watch in horror and try to cross the border as little as possible. I’ve got to say though, I love reading your political posts-they make me laugh. In the present situation there is not much else you can do. Auguri to your nipotino! Ciao, Cristina
John Henderson
July 10, 2024 @ 7:08 am
Thanks, Cristina. You have no idea how envied you are by Americans right now. Well, half the Americans.
Richard J. Goodrich
July 11, 2024 @ 3:08 am
I am in Oregon on a two month interlude–promoting a new book and enjoying the ocean–between a two year stay in the Holy Land and an August departure for 1+ years in Taiwan. I’ll be amazed if you can find “cheap” beer. A simple sandwich in a restaurant now runs $16; I wanted to buy a red onion in Safeway and discovered that they have stopped charging by weight. A red onion now costs $.99–apiece.
Ready to return to a more rational world.
John Henderson
July 11, 2024 @ 7:11 am
Funny you mentioned “cheap” beer, Richard. After I posted the blog, I kicked myself for not calling it “cheaper” beer in relation to wine. We have dinner reservations Sunday at a Senegalese restaurant in Harlem and the lowest-priced glass of wine is $14. Yes, I think I’ll be very sober this trip.
Curt
July 16, 2024 @ 6:01 am
Really enjoyed the article John. I think one night at a 50 Year Reunion is enough, so be thankful your Nephew is getting married. We’re probably moving from the Philippines back to the U.S. next Summer, and I am NOT looking forward to it for a long list of reasons, many of which you’ve already mentioned. The MAGAt movement is completely beyond my understanding, but as much as I want to, arguing with these zombies is fruitless. What they see in this loathsome human cheeto is beyond my understanding. So please John, don’t try and fix any of these unfortunates you come in contact with. They’re lost; and they’re never coming back. If you overhear a pro-Trump conversation in your vicinity, just move away…..quickly. You can’t help them. Just be happy YOU are not infected.
John Henderson
July 25, 2024 @ 12:41 pm
Thanks for the nice comments, Curt. I survived the reunion unscathed. I didn’t hear one single political discussion. More details in an email. I heard you were moving back. Something about social security? Frankly, I hope I never return. The sticker shock will kill you. I have four blogs planned on my visit.